If I Say Yes (Say Something #1) Page 17

  Touching him unleashes a caged animal, and he quickly strips my leggings off, leaving me wearing nothing but my lace underwear. “You have no idea what you do to me,” he says in a heavy voice. He crushes his lips against mine, pressing his erection against the very thin material that covers me, and my body vibrates with arousal. I use my feet to slide his pajama bottoms down, and he springs free. Reid stops kissing me and traces a path down my body once more, stopping to give attention to my breasts before continuing downwards. He hooks his fingers into my underwear and pulls them down. I take a breath. No going back now, and nothing but pure excitement courses through my veins.

  He gently presses his lips onto my folds and slowly slips his tongue in between. My body shudders; pure ecstasy is pulsing through my veins. His tongue darts around, pressing closer to the spot that sends my toes curling, and I scream out in pleasure. “Oh. My. God! Don’t stop.”

  A low growl sounds from Reid as he sends me further over the edge. Just as I am about to climax, he pulls his tongue out of me, and I moan. “Are you sure you want this?” Reid stares at me. His normally dark eyes are hazy with pleasure, and I nod my head. “I promise to go easy.” I bite down on my lower lip as he enters me. I wince at the discomfort, but it is quickly replaced with the feeling of ecstasy again. “Oh fuck, you’re so tight,” Reid says through gritted teeth. “You feel so good.”

  “Faster,” I say breathlessly. Reid begins to pump faster, and I can feel my orgasm growing. “I’m going to come!” I scream.

  “We’ll go together,” he says. I match Reid thrust for thrust, and we cry out together as we let our release go. He collapses on top of me, panting and breathless, and he brushes the hair out of my face and smiles. “You are so beautiful…” He kisses me. “I’m falling in love with you.”

  I still. I tighten my hold on Reid, not allowing him to pull up and look at me, and my mind is a cluster of thoughts. It’s all too much. Going from swearing off men, to being in a relationship, to having sex. I can’t deal with this emotion. But his words melt my heart, and I know I love him, too, whether I will admit it or not.

  “Me, too,” I whisper and kiss him again. We stay like that for a few minutes longer before he pulls out of me, and I don’t want him to go. I want to lie like that forever, just him and me, in our own little world. Reid helps me up off his bed, leading me to the bathroom, and turns on the series of showerheads. I step into the waterfall cascading down on us, pull Reid against me, and kiss him. After a few minutes of kissing and touching, Reid takes me again against the marble wall of his shower. I know in that moment I will never get enough of him. No matter how hard I try.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

  I NEVER MADE IT back to my room last night. I never even made it back into my clothes. After our rendezvous in the shower, we had sex three more times in his bed, stopping only long enough to get a couple of hours of sleep before work this morning. Now, as I stand in the closet full of clothes, I fight to keep my eyes open. I’m exhausted, and my body is sore in a good way. I feel awakened, like I have been asleep the last six years of my life. I spot a black dress hanging on the left side of the closet, and though I haven’t seen the entire collection yet, I know it’s the perfect dress to wear on my first day back.

  I pull the dress off the rack, finding it’s plain and simple and short. I know once I put it on it will only be long enough to cover my goods. Worse, it’s strapless. Definitely not office attire, but I don’t care. I feel great and want to keep this feeling going. This is the perfect dress for it. I slip on the dress; the tight elastic material clings to me in all the right places and accents my body in a way that I didn’t know possible. I decide to tone the dress down with a simple pair of flats and some basic jewelry. I leave my hair down and apply very minimal makeup. The dress is more than enough for me, and while I’m feeling brave, I’m not that brave. I grab a long, white pea coat on my way out.

  I leave the closet and skip over to Reid’s room, unable to hide my excitement to see his expression when he sees the dress I am in. Reid stumbles over himself when he walks out of his closet, his jaw drops and his eyes widen. “Please tell me you’re wearing something over that?” he says in a serious voice as he struggles to straighten his tie.

  “Relax,” I walk towards him, “I grabbed a jacket.” I point to the white coat on his bed and laugh. Reid relaxes his shoulders and relief washes over his face. I grab a hold of his tie and smile. “Here, let me help you.” I straighten his tie and help him slip on his jacket. The man looks amazing in a suit, but I prefer him naked. The thought makes me giggle out loud like a school girl.

  “What’s so funny?” He glances at me and raises an eyebrow.

  “Nothing.” I kiss him quickly before turning and grabbing my jacket off the bed. “Let’s go make people talk.”

  ***

  My happy mood is gone as we enter the building. The playful, brave, adventurous woman I met this morning is slowly disappearing. What was I thinking about, wearing this dress to the office? What was I thinking about, coming to work with Reid? I’m clearly out of my mind, but it’s too late to go back and change my outfit now. My palms are sweaty as Reid and I head towards the elevator. I can feel everyone in the lobby eyeing us. I know they can’t see the dress underneath the pea coat, but I might as well have come to work naked with how I’m feeling. I notice that no one is really paying Reid much attention, focused instead on the woman hanging from his arm as he whispers sweet nothings in her ear, and that woman is me. “What’s wrong?” Reid’s voice snaps me out of my haze on the elevator.

  “I-I-I, uh… everyone was staring at us,” I say.

  “Well, let’s give them something to stare at.” We’re alone in the elevator, so I don’t know what he is thinking when he said that. He pulls me close, our bodies pressing against one another, and his mouth crashes against mine. His tongue darts into my mouth and starts the familiar dance with mine. I hear a collective gathering of gasps, whispers, and it snaps me out of the kiss. I glance around and find that we are standing in the elevator with the doors wide open on our floor. “We have nothing to be embarrassed about,” Reid whispers in my ear. “We’re just two people in love.” With that, he kisses my temple and walks away with a grin on his face, leaving me there to face everyone on my own. I lower my head and quickly make my way through the seemingly endless cubicles and desks until I reach my office and close the door behind me.

  I lean against the door and sigh. Until I remember that my office has glass windows and everyone can still see me. I grab the string above my door and close the blinds over the window before going and closing the rest of the blinds. I sink down into my chair and stare at the ceiling for several minutes before I snake out of my jacket and hang it over the back of my chair. I stare at my computer screen that is glowing in front of me. I no longer dread turning it on and staring at the hoard of query letters I once would struggle to read. No, over the couple weeks I was at the cabin, Reid helped me through that problem. What frightened me was the possibility of any anonymous emails awaiting me. I have forgotten about them momentarily, being so caught up in Reid, and now here I am. Back in the real world and back into contact with technology.

  I turn on my computer, waiting for it to boot up, and tap the tip of a pen against my desk. When my email loads, I hold my breath, and slowly release it when I see that no haunting emails are waiting for me. Unless you count Viola as frightening, but I am about to remedy that problem now. I read the couple emails she sent while I was in la-la land with Reid and can’t help but laugh at them. Finally after the last one, I respond with a quick email and let her know that I have decided to sign two authors, which was the truth, and am making headway on signing another.

  I work through the morning, reading letter after letter, lost in thought, and jump when my office door flies open. I look over and see Reid standing there. He closes the door and leans up against it. “Would it be possible to talk you into taking a break and grabbing some lunch with me?�
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  “I thought you’d never ask.”

  As we leave the office, I realize that Heidi isn’t behind her desk, just like she wasn’t the last time I was in the office, and she was replaced with some blonde headed temp. I feel guilty for not knowing why Heidi is absent and wonder if she has been the entire time I was gone. I make a mental note to call her tonight and check on her to make sure she is okay.

  We grab lunch at my favorite café down the street, where Reid lets me know that he was going to be staying late at the office all week to catch up from being on vacation. He lets me know that while Lawrence approved our vacation, he certainly wasn’t happy that his nephew had taken so much time off as well, but that he sent his well wishes and hoped I was ready to tackle some authors. I feel guilty realizing that I kept Reid away from work, even though he assures me that he wouldn’t have it any other way. After lunch, Reid walks me back to my office with promises of picking me up from the house and taking me out to dinner to celebrate our first day back at the office.

  ***

  Being back at Reid’s house alone feels weird. I didn’t feel comfortable wandering around without him here. I discover that he has a workout fiend’s dream gym in the basement beneath his house, that he basically has a mini movie theater on the far side of his house, as well as an indoor/outdoor pool on the backside of his house. I walk through each room, each as grand as the last, getting myself familiar with the surroundings. I don’t know how long I am going to be staying here, and to be honest, I don’t want to leave. I know everything is moving fast, but I really don’t want to go back to my apartment. I don’t want to be alone. I don’t want to be without Reid. Eventually, I find myself back in his room. Curiosity wins the best of me, and I begin to snoop around. It is wrong, and I know it, but I can’t help myself. I try to open the chest but the padlock is secure.

  I search for a key, digging through the large mahogany desk near the fireplace, and come up empty. I move onto the nightstand near his bed. I pull out the first drawer and find nothing of importance. The bottom drawer gives a bit of a fight but I finally manage to tug it open, but inside is only two items facing downward. I pick up the first item, which is a picture frame, and turn it over. My breath hitches when I see the framed picture. In the picture is a beautiful brunette. She seems young, happy, and in love. She isn’t alone, however. In the photo, Reid is standing next to her, grinning from ear to ear, holding a baby bundled in a blue blanket.

  He had a family… Tears prick my eyes, and I feel my heart breaking. Yes, keeping secrets about who I really am, and who my family was, is big. I won’t deny it. Reid not telling me he might possibly have a brother is big, but it’s something I can live with. But not telling me that he once had a wife and a son… I’m not sure that is something I can handle.

  I set the picture aside, my hands shaking, and my heart pounding. I pull out the little leather bound book. I turn it over and determine it’s a photo album, and I am unsure I want to open it. I do. I open the first page, and the first photo is a close up of the brunette laughing. She looks absolutely heavenly. On the next page is an ultrasound with the name Lily Harder, and a lump forms in my throat, and I struggle to swallow it down. I shouldn’t be snooping, but I can’t help it. The next series of photos are of her growing belly. Reid and the male I saw in the photographs in the hall make an occasional appearance. The pictures turn to photos of the most handsome baby boy I have ever seen. Several of them have Reid holding the baby and beaming like a proud father.

  The tears rush down my face. Why wouldn’t he have told me about them? The same reason you haven’t told him about yourself, my inner critic taunts me. I hear someone clear their throat, and I quickly glance up and see Reid standing in front of me, several feet away. “I-I-I…” I’m at a loss for words. “I shouldn’t have been snooping.”

  His eyes are dark, and he is tense. He says nothing as he closes the distance between us and sits down on the bed on the other side of where I placed the framed photograph. “Lily,” he says softly, staring down at the picture. My heart shatters when he says her name, as if it’s a confirmation of what I have been thinking since I came across the photos. I didn’t want it to be true, but the way he is acting only makes it real. “She was my sister-in-law…” Wait, what? “This is Ollie,” he points to the baby, “my nephew. They died in a house fire.” His words are weak, and I have no idea what to say. He stares at the photos for a few more seconds before placing them back into the drawer. For some reason, I feel like he isn’t telling me the whole story, but I don’t question him.

  “I didn’t know you had a brother.” I finally break the silence. Reid glances at me and nods his head. His eyes are still dark, and anger is burning in them. “The guys in the photo? Are they your father and brother?” He nods again. “I-I-I’m really sorry… I shouldn’t have invaded your privacy.”

  He reaches out and pulls me against his chest. Tears prick my eyes as I feel for his loss. “Don’t worry about it. I should have told you about them,” he says. He sounds distant, and I get the feeling I’m still not getting the whole story. “Now,” he kisses the top of my head, “I do believe I promised you dinner.”

  The change of subject makes me realize that he doesn’t want to talk about it or them. So I squeeze him tighter and nod my head. “Yes, I do believe you did.”

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

  THE RIDE TO THE RESTAURANT is tense. I apologize profusely to Reid a million times for poking my head around, and he reassures me that it isn’t a big deal. He is still distant, and I wonder what it will take for him to open up to me. I think about telling him something about myself, if not all of it, but I still can’t seem to get the words to form correctly. So I sit in the passenger seat, my head pressing against the cool window, and watch as the buildings pass us by. Mozart quietly plays in the background as we pull up in front of a restaurant. It’s a newer one that just opened up in town, and I hadn’t had the chance to try it out yet.

  The restaurant is quaint, nothing too rich and extravagant, just perfect for a dinner date. Reid parks the car in the back parking area, rounds the car, and helps me out in typical Reid fashion. He rests his hand on my lower back, guides me around the small building, and through the entrance. Inside, the place is warm and inviting. Small, round, intimate tables are placed throughout the dining area with candle lights. The walls are painted a deep red, and a fire is burning in a grand fireplace on the farthest side of the room. Over half of the tables are filled, and the waitress leads us to a back corner table. I shed my jacket, still wearing the dress I wore to the office today, and take a seat with my back against the wall.

  Reid smiles, “Have I told you how delectable you are in that dress?”

  “Well, if you play your cards right, you may win the right to help me out of it tonight.” I grin, seizing the moment to soak up our normal repartee. “Maybe I’ll even let you have some dessert if you’re a good boy.” A low growl vibrates across the table, and I smile again.

  The waitress comes back to fill our glasses with some wine and hands us our menus. I decide to try the chicken linguine, and Reid orders a steak with some sides. As we drink our wine, we talk about everything except for the incident in the bedroom earlier. Reid carries most of the conversation, careful to drive the topic away from my discovery. I’m sure he realizes that I know what he is doing, but I say nothing and go with the flow of conversation. The food arrives, and it’s as good as it sounded. I steal a few bites of Reid’s steak throughout dinner and wish I had ordered it for myself. The steak is marinated in an amazing sauce and melts right in your mouth. It is like a combination of flavors bursting in your mouth between the red wine and the seasonings. Reid takes care of the bill, and as we start to leave the restaurant, I see the last person I expected to see. On his arm is someone who looks eerily familiar, but I couldn’t place her.

  “Elias?” Eli stops and glances between Reid and I. He tenses but puts on his best fake smile. Since I saw him the last time in
my apartment, he’s cut his hair and lost some weight. Not that he needed to, but he has. His eyes look baggy, as if he hasn’t slept in weeks, and just the sight of him makes my heart break.

  “Oh hey, Liza,” he says softly, and his eyes flicker towards Reid again. “How are you doing? Are you okay?”

  “I tried to call…” My words hang in the air. “But you never answer.”

  “I’ve been busy.”

  “Too busy to talk to your best friend?” My voice begins to get slightly louder as the irritation builds. He glances back at the dark haired woman that came in with him, and I squint my eyes. I can’t help but think how familiar she seems. She shrinks behind Eli, as if to hide from my glaring eyes. “If you didn’t want to talk to me, you could’ve just told me, instead of ignoring me like we were in high school again.”

  “Can we have this conversation another time? My date and I came to have dinner.” I can’t believe him. He is dismissing me over some broad he is here with, someone I don’t even know. Why not? I did the same thing with him when I chose Reid over my best friend.

  “I’m sorry,” I say softly, tears brimming my eyes, and I walk past him. I glance over my shoulder as I open the door and see Reid has pulled him off to the side. He is whispering, but I can see he is not happy, and I am surprised when I see Reid clap a hand on his shoulder, nod his head, and head in my direction. “What was that about?”

  “Just two grown men having a chat,” Reid answers.

  I walk faster to the car, irritated beyond belief. My first official date with Reid since we became a couple has not gotten the start or ending I was hoping. Reid unlocks the car with the button in his hand, and I climb into the car, slamming the door behind me. Reid sits down in the car, puts the key into the ignition, but doesn’t turn it. “I hate secrets, you know,” I say, staring straight out the window.