This One’s For You Read online

  I felt my face get hotter.

  “Seriously, Brenn,” she continued. “You can dance.”

  “I might’ve taken some classes here and there,” I admitted. And by that, I meant I’d been dancing since before I could walk. My mother insisted on having well-rounded children, and that meant dance and music lessons for me, and playing basically every sport for my brothers.

  “Why do I get the feeling there is so much more you’re hiding?” Amelia pressed. “Tell me one thing . . .  you’re not a hired assassin are you? My dad’s made enemies in the world . . . enemies I’m sure that would like to take a shot at his daughter.”

  Callen and I burst into laughter. Some of the things that came out of her mouth were absolutely absurd, and made no sense at all. A coy smile played on my lips. “If I told you,” I said, “then I’d have to kill you.”

  Amelia threw a pillow at me, and I fell back on my bed, laughing. I heard Callen starting to laugh again too, then groan as Amelia elbowed him in the side.

  “We still on for lunch?” I heard him whisper to her.

  I bolted upright and stared at them. “You two have lunch plans?” I asked, trying not to sound offended by being left out.

  They glanced at each other. “Well, yeah,” Callen said.

  “You can join us if you want!” Amelia quickly jumped in.

  “No, no,” I said. “I wouldn’t want to intrude.” I watched them exchange glances. Something strange is going on, I thought.

  “NO!” Amelia shouted, jumping to her feet. She settled back down on her bed and took a deep breath. “You aren’t intruding.” I wasn’t sure who she was trying to convince. “In fact, why don’t you invite Owen?”

  “Yeah,” Callen chimed in. “We could make a double date of it.”

  So, they were going on a date. This was interesting.

  “It isn’t a date,” Amelia immediately corrected, and I noticed how Callen’s face fell. It was clear that while it might’ve not been a date for Amelia, it definitely was for him. This was something I was going to have to get to the bottom of. “Go see if Owen is free,” she said. “Now.”

  Her command nearly made me jump out of my skin. As I walked across the room, I heard them whispering. I hesitated for a moment, wanting to turn around and listen closer, but I kept going. I went into the hall and paused in front of Owen’s door. As I was about to knock, the door flew open. My eyes fell on a head full of blonde hair—only it wasn’t Owen’s.

  “Felicity,” I said, thick with disgust.

  She curled her lips into a grin that sent chills down my spine. “You’re in my way,” she said, narrowing her eyes at me.

  I couldn’t believe it.

  I clenched my fists at my side and gritted my teeth. Malibu Barbie brushed past me, intentionally bumping my shoulder with hers. Owen appeared behind her, wide-eyed, and looking like he had just been caught red-handed. Well, he had, and that was all I needed. I spun on my heels and took a few steps back to my door.

  “Brennan!” Owen called. I froze, my hand wrapped around the door handle.

  “Owen,” Felicity said. “Are you coming?”

  I held my breath, waiting for him to say something. Anything. “No,” he said sharply.

  I released the air slowly out of my lungs, still unable to move. I closed my eyes, trying to will myself to open the door and disappear behind it.

  “You’re seriously going to choose her over me?” she asked. I heard her scoff.

  “It isn’t much of a choice,” Owen replied. My heart swelled, and I couldn’t help the smile that appeared on my face. “I’ll always choose her.”

  “Well, when you get bored with her—and you will—you know where to find me,” she said sarcastically.

  I glanced over and saw her walk away. She moved like a snake, sneaky and ready to strike. I had a feeling that what just happened wasn’t a good thing. That she’d let this go too easily—and that now I’d have to watch my back. I’d heard the rumors about Felicity—what Felicity wanted, Felicity got—and she wanted Owen. Nothing was going to stop her from getting him—not even me.

  “Brennan?” Owen said softly. “It isn’t what you think.”

  I inhaled a sharp breath and turned around. “If it wasn’t what I thought, then you wouldn’t need the feel to explain yourself.”

  “But I do,” he said earnestly. “I want you to know the truth. She came by and asked me to come over to help her study for finals. That was all.”

  My body shook with angry laughter. “You can’t honestly believe she really wanted to study, can you?” He shrugged his shoulders, forcing another giggle from me. “Owen, studying was not on her agenda.”

  “It was on mine,” he said.

  I shook my head. Owen was a fool if he really believed that’s what she wanted to do. All girls just happened to wear skirts with their ass hanging out, a low-cut shirt, and hooker heels when asking for a study buddy. Felicity was most definitely looking to knock on some walls. The thought made my blood boil.

  I reached for my locket, rubbing it vigorously. Owen came over to me and wrapped his hand around mine. He stared into my eyes, cupping my cheek with his other hand. His thumb brushed along my cheekbone. His touch instantly soothed me. I averted my eyes.

  “Look at me,” he whispered. “I promise you that I was only planning to help her study.”

  I refused to meet his eyes. “Even if that’s true, it’s not like you’re not free to do whatever you want. You want to sleep with someone, then by all means, sleep with her. It’s not like I can expect you to be celibate. We’re friends—nothing more.”

  I heard Owen sigh. I couldn’t believe I’d said that, and I don’t think he was expecting it either. But it was true, he said it so himself earlier. It’s what we’ve both been saying, I thought.

  For a moment, a glimmer of warmth flitted across Owen’s face, and he looked like he had something really important to say. “Brenn—”

  The door behind me opened. Owen dropped his hands from mine and took a step back. I winced at his sudden change.

  “Owen, good,” Amelia said from behind me. “I take it that Brennan invited you to lunch already.”

  His eyes flicked to mine. “No, in fact, she hasn’t.”

  “Jeez, girl, how long does it take to ask a guy to lunch?” she asked, appearing at my side.

  Longer than you’d expect when a walking, talking Barbie emerges from said guy’s room . . . I thought to myself.

  “Well, what do you say?” Amelia said.

  I lifted my gaze to meet his. He looked at me carefully, as if waiting for me to answer for him. I relaxed my shoulders, and gave him a slight nod. “I’m in,” he answered.

  “Great!” Amelia squealed. “We’re leaving in just a few.”

  “I need to put some shoes on,” I said, to no one in particular.

  “Get a move on then!” she said, slapping me on the butt. I jumped up and headed into our room. Callen was still sitting on Amelia’s bed.

  “Is Owen down for lunch?” he asked.

  I grabbed the flats I wore earlier and slipped them onto my feet. “Unfortunately,” I said, my voice full of disappointment, “yes, he is.”

  THIRTEEN

  AFTER FINDING A RESTAURANT for lunch, Amelia and I excused ourselves to the bathroom. While Amelia fixed her makeup, I turned the sink on and stuck my hands under the water.

  “What’s going on with you and Mr. Sex-on-legs?” Amelia asked.

  “Nothing,” I answered, rubbing soap onto my hands.

  “I’m not an idiot, Brennan,” she said. “I saw the two of you when I opened the door. And don’t think I didn’t hear about the two of you this morning.”

  “What about us?” I asked quickly, glancing at her reflection in the mirror.

  “I heard the two of you were pretty cozy walking to and from class today,” she teased. “I also heard that you guys looked positively gorgeous together. Not that I didn’t think that already.”


  I turned off the sink, reaching for the paper towels, and faced her. “We’re just friends,” I told her regretfully.

  I had never hated a word as much as I did the word friends. Owen and I weren’t friends. Friends didn’t have what we had. Amelia—she was a friend. Callen—he was a friend, too. And Owen . . .  well, I had no idea what he was, but he was certainly not a friend.

  “Why are you guys being so stubborn?” she pressed. “It’s obvious the two of you are into each other.”

  The truth was on the tip of my tongue. Because I’m pretty sure if Owen asked me to, I thought, I’d break my promise to Reagan without second thought.

  “That might be true,” I replied. “But it’s what we decided on.”

  She rolled her eyes, and linked her arm into mine. “Well if my opinion counts for anything, I think that decision sucks.”

  She’s not the only one who thinks it sucks, I thought.

  When we got to the table, Amelia took a seat next to Callen, leaving me to sit next to Owen. I didn’t look at him as I sat down, busying myself with looking at the menu.

  Owen leaned over and whispered in my ear. “We need to talk.”

  “No, we don’t,” I said quickly, flipping through the menu.

  I glanced up and saw Callen and Amelia staring at us. I raised an eyebrow to Amelia, and she quickly turned to Callen.

  “So, Callen . . .” she said, trying to distract him.

  “I already told you it wasn’t what it looked like,” Owen said, pressing the issue.

  I chewed on the inside of my cheek, still pretending to study the menu. “Owen, I already said you didn’t have to explain anything to me.”

  He let out a frustrated grunt. I looked to Amelia and Callen. Amelia was doing her best trying to keep Callen’s attention, but he was hardly listening to what she was saying. I could see him watching us out the corner of his eye, trying to listen in on the conversation that I was trying to avoid.

  “Why are you being so stubborn?” Owen said; his voice was rough but soft at the same time. It was like a frustrated whisper.

  “Why are you insisting on talking about this?” I snapped back.

  He grabbed my chair and turned it until I faced him. If no one was paying attention to us before, they definitely were now. Owen either didn’t notice people were watching us, or he didn’t care. His green eyes locked onto mine and I couldn’t look away.

  “Because I know you’re upset with me,” he said. “And I don’t like it when you’re upset with me.”

  “Why does it matter?”

  He released another frustrated growl. “I think it’s obvious by now, isn’t it?”

  “I don’t know,” I said, staring hard into his eyes. “You tell me.”

  I was done with this. I couldn’t handle the hot-and-cold moments anymore. When Owen didn’t respond, I turned my chair around. I felt Amelia and Callen staring at me and picked up my menu again, ignoring them.

  “That’s what I thought,” I muttered under my breath.

  Owen slammed a fist on top of the table, startling me, and I jumped in my seat. His chair made a screeching noise as it slid across the floor. My heart caught in my throat as he leaned down next to me, his breath like a flamethrower on my ear.

  “I’m not the only one playing this game,” he whispered, then walked away.

  My breath was shaky, and tears stung my eyes. I blinked and focused on the menu’s pages. I shifted uncomfortably in my seat, fully aware that my friends across the table were staring at me.

  “What?” I finally snapped at them.

  The two of them exchanged glances before Amelia reached over and pulled the menu from my hands.

  “What was that?” she asked.

  “Noth—”

  “And don’t say it was nothing,” she cut me off. “It was clearly something. Now start talking.”

  I looked over at Callen. He must’ve caught on that I didn’t want to talk about it in front of him because he raised from his chair and cleared his throat.

  “I’m gonna go see if I can catch Owen,” he said, before walking away.

  “Now . . .” Amelia said. “Start talking.”

  “There’s nothing to talk about, Amelia”

  “Brennan, stop holding back, and just talk to me,” she stressed. “I’m your roommate, not an idiot. That’s what friends are for: to talk and listen when needed. And right now, that’s what you need to do—talk.”

  There was that word again—friends. I seriously never thought I would dislike a word as much as I disliked that one. I cleared my throat. Amelia was right, I needed to talk, and I was holding back, afraid to let her in.

  “I’ll sort it out on my own,” I answered quietly.

  “You know what, Brennan,” she said, full of frustration. “That’s what the problem is. You shut everyone out. You won’t open yourself to the possibilities around you. All we want is to be let in, and you’re like a clam. I want to be your friend more than anything, the person you turn to, but only if you want me to. Otherwise, I’m done with this bullshit. And I can’t blame Owen for being done with it too.”

  It felt like the chair had been pulled from under me, and that I had landed on a bed of nails. My stomach was in knots, and I felt the tears threatening to return. As Amelia got up, I wanted to say something, anything to get her to stay, but I couldn’t. I wasn’t even sure what I wanted to tell her—I just knew that I was angry with her.

  Here she was, putting everything on me, when she had no idea. I wasn’t the only one to blame. Why wasn’t she angry with Owen? Was it because he was the one to get up first and walk out?

  As she walked out the bistro, I couldn’t blame her for being upset, no matter how pissed I was at the moment. Everything she had just said was right—I wouldn’t let anyone in. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to—I just couldn’t. I’d tried. I‘d wanted to more times than I could count, but I never could.

  I had a fortress built around my heart. It would take an army to break the walls down.

  After a few minutes, I set out a couple dollars on the table for our drinks, then left the restaurant. I wasn’t ready to head back to the dorms. I didn’t want to deal with seeing anyone. So I wondered around campus instead.

  I’d walked around the campus more times than I could count, but it looked different when I was alone. I took time to notice the beautiful architectural design that went into each building. I appreciated the care that the landscapers took in the grounds. And though the fog that started to creep in with the evening gave it an eerie feeling, it made it seem magical—a place of dreams. I was beginning to realize why Reagan had loved the campus so much when she toured it the summer before last. It truly was beautiful.

  The moon was full when I made my way back to the dorms. My room was empty when I got back, but I couldn’t say I was surprised. Amelia was pretty hurt when she left me sitting at the bistro. And I couldn’t blame her for that. The only person to blame was myself—well, myself and Owen. If it weren’t for either of us, none of this would’ve been happening.

  I changed into my pajamas and crawled into bed. I had a feeling Amelia wasn’t going to be coming back tonight. And if she did, it’d be long after I’d fallen asleep. I pulled out the photo album tucked safely under my pillow, clutched it to my chest, and stared at the wall. Eventually, my eyes grew heavy, and I drifted off to sleep.

  I woke to the sound of banging on my door. I pulled off my blanket, rolled over, and found Amelia’s bed was untouched. She hadn’t come back at all. The thought made my chest tighten, and I was overwhelmed with guilt. The knocking continued, so I pushed myself out of bed and crossed the room. Opening the door, I gasped.

  “Owen,” I said hesitantly. “What are you doing here?”

  “It’s almost time for your calculus class, isn’t it?” he asked, pushing himself into my room.

  I glanced over my shoulder toward the clock on the desk and saw that it was a little after nine. My
class started in thirty minutes, but that still didn’t explain what Owen was doing here.

  “If you want to make it across campus in time, I suggest you get dressed now,” he said, taking a seat on the end of my bed.

  I closed the door and crossed my arms over my chest. “I’m perfectly capable of getting myself to class.”

  Owen remained silent.

  “There’s no need to be here,” I said, heading toward the closet.

  “Just get dressed,” he said sharply.

  I sighed, pulling a random shirt off a hanger. As I yanked a pair of skinny jeans out of the drawer, I looked over at Owen, who was watching me, and held up the clothes. To my surprise, instead of leaving the room, he turned so his back was facing me. I cleared my throat, and he fidgeted on the bed, but made no move to leave the room.

  Grumbling to myself, I got dressed as quickly as I could. I pulled on my flats from the day before, crossed the room, grabbed my laptop, and tossed it inside my shoulder bag. Owen looked to me.

  “Got everything?” he asked. I nodded in response. “Good, let’s go.”

  “Owen, I can walk myself to class.”

  “I’m aware of that, but I’m still walking with you.”

  The look he gave me made me realize he was not going to change his mind. I picked up my bag and headed in his direction. He opened the door, and ushered me out first. As we walked down the hall, I was aware of how close he was behind me. We entered the elevator in silence.

  It wasn’t until we made it outside that I realized I’d forgotten a jacket. I turned to go back, but instead, Owen slipped his arm around me, just like he had done before, and pressed me forward.

  “Owen.” I shrugged out of his arms. “We aren’t doing this.”

  He kept his hold on me. “I don’t care what you say, Brennan. I’m walking you to class, and I’m going to make sure you stay warm in the process.”

  I pulled free from his arm and kept walking. “If you’re so concerned about me being warm, then you should’ve reminded me to grab a jacket.”

  I glanced at him and caught a slight smile on his face. I was starting to think he’d intended for this to happen. He could walk me to class all he wanted to, but he’d have to keep his hands off me.